There’s something about waking up and looking over at your husband, exactly one year after pledging your undying devotion, that just makes you explode with pride and a darker, deeper, more instinctual breed of love. It’s different than the butterflies and the blushing that took precedence over every little thing when we first started dating. Every time our eyes met we giggled and we relentlessly tried to spend every second together, sure the world would stop turning if we were torn apart. It’s different than the first time we said ‘I love you’, smiling in wonderment as the words left our lips and shimmered in the air between us. It’s different than when we got engaged and started making everything out of nothing. The second he proposed we were a family and it was more than love, then…it was an all consuming desire to protect each other and fight for each other until the end of time. We are each other’s sanctuary. It’s different than when we first got married, riding on clouds, one endless honeymoon. We learned something every single day, each other’s thoughts and desires ingrained in our minds, walking blindly forward, holding hands and never letting go. Everything falling into place so perfectly, that the two of us could find each other in this complicated world, is what keeps the world so delicately spinning. He is my reality and everything I was designed to live for, teaching me everything, holding me up in reverence. This is all I know how to live for, and if every year is as amazing as the last, then it’s more than I deserve.
We spent the day at the Julestarz Christmas party where I tottered around in sparkly heels, following Husband while he dressed up like Santa and passed out candy canes and happiness to every child there.
He surprised me with flowers in our pretty little crystal vase and we drank wine out of our crystal special-occasion glasses and we cooked a nice little dinner and cuddled and watched the Harry Potter marathon with lots of intermittent forehead kisses and I love you’s.
And I wrote Alex a new set of vows, the way I see things now and how our future plays out in the depths of my mind:
“…Further down the road, glimmering darkly, is our end. When we die, our souls will diffuse into the universe and we will become the face of the stars that give life to the dark night, we will melt into the waves of the unforgiving seas, we will become the precious air that our grandchildren breath. And somewhere in the mystique of this world, the beating of our furiously pounding hearts will still be heard, so madly in love that not even death could hush the sound.”
You are my world, Husband.
